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Grosse Pointe Garden Society TV Quotes

Updated: May 26








INTRODUCTION


A shocking murder ensnares four members of the local garden club in an affluent suburb where everything seems ideal on the outside. In order to conceal the body and remove any trace of it, Alice, a teacher and aspiring writer, Catherine, a real estate agent, Brett, a father of two, and Birdie, a socialite, gather on the evening of the garden club's annual gala. But with intrigue, drama, and dishonesty sprouting up in their individual lives, this secret might not remain hidden for much longer.


Petals, Poison, and Punchlines: Best NBC'S 2025 TV Quotes from Grosse Pointe Garden Society


SEASON 1

 

EPISODE 1


They say people look like their dogs.

But when you're in a garden club,

you're more like the flowers you plant.

 

If I was a flower, I think I'd be a geranium.

Sure, they might be boring in a garden,

but that's because they're meant to run wild in a meadow.

The worst thing you can do to a geranium?

Plant one where it doesn't belong, because eventually someone

just walks all over it.

 

Good thing about dandelions?

They can grow just about anywhere.

They're built to survive...

Unless they catch their wives pollinating

with another flower.

Then they shrivel up, and all that's left is a wish.

 

She is the hardest-working

flower in the garden.

Zinnias bloom heavily,

regardless of climate.

All they ask for is a little

sunlight from their husband.

But they seldom get what they need.

 

Our newest volunteer, Birdie,

is a classic lily of the valley.

Invasive, wild, and without boundaries

They're notorious in Grosse Pointe...

And extremely toxic...

To everything that gets in its path.

 

Here's what they don't tell you

when you join a garden club.

Once you mix a bunch of

different flowers together,

they all may look

perfect on the surface,

but you never really know

what's growing underneath.

So this isn't just a home, my friends.

It's a work of art.

 

We all get older, but

the books stay the same.

That's why they're classics.

Hard to know with poetry, though.

 

The thing is, dreamers don't get far.

They just get hurt.

You know, just because you

can have anything you want

doesn't mean you should.

 

You got to be careful when

you make things personal.

You know...

karma and stuff.

 

Here's what you learn

when you plant a garden.

All that beauty is

just a happy accident,

a random mix of insects rotting

and compost decaying.

So to make a garden grow,

something has to die.

 

EPISODE 2


Every garden has unwanted guests.

Slugs linger on the leaves...

They slowly eat away at

everything you care about.

Spider mites are even worse,

'cause no matter how hard you try,

they're impossible to control.

 

Aphids are like a plague.

By the time you detect them,

you're already infested.

But the most dreaded intruders,

the ones that do the most damage,

always seem to come out at night.

 

Are you sick of having to

pull out weeds by hand?

Flip over your rake, and I'll show you

an easy trick to save your garden bed.

 

It wouldn't be an affair

if someone didn't get hurt.

 

Every gardener agrees a pest

is nature's way of telling us

we're doing something wrong.

But what they can't agree on...

the best way to get rid of one.

 

Sometimes the infestation

just takes over.

And when that happens,

there's only one thing left to do.

Burn it all down.

 

EPISODE 3


No one likes to look at a dead garden.

All they see is a big pile of dirt.

What was once lush and vibrant

is now barren and bleak.

My job is to bring

the dirt back to life.

So when I look at a dead garden,

I just see possibility.

 

You know, sometimes

these things get worse

before they get better.

 

My customers think gardens are just

a bunch of pretty flowers.

What they don't know is,

the right pairing makes

all the difference...

Like how shade from a sunflower

triples the yield of a cucumber patch.

But not every pairing works out.

Cause when you do, there's

always a price to pay.

 

EPISODE 4


I've never understood what's

so great about a garden.

Carefully curated flowers

trapped in perfect formation?

They're like animals in a zoo.

They can't survive unless

people give them food and water.

So if gardens are supposed

to be about nature,

I'd say they're pretty unnatural.

 

Well, if you're interested

in getting your hands dirty

in a good way, come join us.

 

Committing a crime

to prove somebody else

committed a crime is

actually still a crime.

 

I didn't say messy can't be fun.

 

Who here has never done something

that they're going to regret

for the rest of their lives?

 

People think by planting a garden,

they can control nature.

They mow lawns into golf courses...

Trim hedges into a maze...

But at a certain point,

nature fights back.

That beautiful oleander

that pops up by your pool?

A single flower can k*ll a horse.

So the dirty little secret?

We don't control nature.

It controls us.

 

EPISODE 5


Thing is, you know, even

when you're with somebody,

you can still be alone.

 

Pollination's an essential element

of any healthy garden.

Bumblebees return to the same flower

again and again...

While butterflies are easily distracted

by bright petals and long stems.

But in the end,

it really doesn't matter

who's pollinating who.

The secret to a great garden

is great sex.

 

Have you...

you ever have that kind of night

where one bad decision just...

leads to another...

and another and another?

 

When pollination fails,

it can be devastating for a garden.

Two flowers competing

for the same ladybug

means one will die.

A pesticide meant to protect a bloomLike everything in nature,

the balance of pollination is delicate.

And you never know

which way it's gonna go

till it's too late.

does the opposite when

it poisons the milk beetle.

 

EPISODE 6


EPISODE 6

People love to say being a mother

is the hardest job in the world.

I’d argue raising a healthy garden

Is just as demanding.

From the expensive equipment

to the pricey pesticides,

gardens are a constant drain

on your resources.

And just when

you can finally enjoy

your garden’s beauty’s …

You have to rake it all out

And start over next session.

 

Do you ever wish that, um

life had a pause button?

 

Whatever it is,

those five minutes

make you forget

that you’re in hell.

 

Well, the right thing to do,

isn’t what I want.

 

I always tell

my friends with kids,

one bad decision can wreck

a whole garden.

Children, on the other hand,

are extremely resilient.

Which is why

seeing a flower grow

can be

infinitely more rewarding.

But not everyone’s cut out

for the responsibility

of plant parenthood.

So you have to make sure you’re ready,

because gardens don’t grow up

and move away.

They’re something

you have to nurture forever.

 

EPISODE 7


I don't know much about flowers,

but I bet growing a garden is

just like growing a business.

Success comes from planting

the right people under you.

Cause no matter what

you have to weather,

you need good, solid roots.

So your business can reap what it sows.

But stray too far from

who you are as a company,

and the whole enterprise

withers on the vine.

 

Don't worry. You can rage

about him to the plants.

They like the screaming.

 

Every great home has a story.

And if you'll please follow

me, I'm ready to tell yours.

 

It's never easy nurturing

a business to maturity.

Anything can disrupt the natural orderSo you gotta weed out

your weakest divisions

in order to focus on

your strongest branches.

of your work environment.

Even then, unforeseen

competition in the marketplace

can siphon resources

and overshadow growth.

So like any healthy ecosystem,

for your business to thrive...

 

EPISODE 8


I like to tell my customers

that gardening isn't just

about planting seeds.

Nature is full of surprises.

A flower isn't always just a flower.

One sunflower is actually made up

of thousands of tiny flowers

held together on a single stalk.

Dirt isn't just a layer of earth.

It has more organisms in one teaspoon

than there are people on the planet.

And those plants in your garden

aren't just sitting there quietly.

They're busy talking to each other

through an underground

network of fungi and bacteria.

So anyone can garden.

But to keep one alive,

you have to expect the unexpected.

 

You have somehow found

a way to make your life

more exhausting than having a baby.

 

The first frost is only surprising

when your garden's not prepared.

So we add things like straw and bark

to shield plants from

dropping temperatures.

We wrap shrubs in burlap to

protect against drying winds.

But no matter what

you do to get ahead of it,

winter always comes.

 

EPISODE 9


In every relationship, there's

a gardener and garden.

One nurtures the other.

The gardener has to

provide the right balance

of attention to help the garden grow.

Tend too much, and you'll

drive the other person away.

Don't tend enough,

and your relationship

will wither and die.

The tricky part is figuring out,

are you the gardener or the garden?

 

Win or lose, it's the journey.

 

Can't we just get back to being

a normal dysfunctional family again?

 

There's always an angle,

depending on which site you're on.

 

Well, the more you push someone away,

the harder it is to get them back.

 

Like I said, in every relationship,

there's a gardener and a garden.

But being a gardener comes with power.

If you don't use it right...

Everything dies.

 

EPISODE 10


Everything has a season.

Just like winter in a garden,

our own lives can feel frozen in time.

But winter can also be a time of growth,

even if it's painful.

So, yeah, everything has a season.

And even though you

know the next one's coming...

You never quite know

how hard it's gonna hit.

Because let's face it,

Mother Nature's a b*tch.

And then you die.

 

It's the things that

you don't want to do

that make you their dad.

 

The... the glue,

the stuff that keeps you

together when you're younger...

it just lost its bond as we got older.

 

Let's be real.

I got more yesterdays than tomorrows.

 

These moments really show

us that life is short, right?

 

EPISODE 11

Stitching a quilt is

like planting a garden.

Just like you pull out dead flowers

to birth new life,

pieces of discarded fabric come together to create something beautiful.

But why waste your time planting

something that'll die

when a quilt lasts forever?

 

Because it's your chance

to get it right this time.

 

We're no different today

than when we lived in caves.

 

Well, the Taj Mahal is 300 years old.

Once you get inside her,

it still takes your breath away.

 

OK, this isn't my most feminist moment,

but two guys fighting

over you is kind of hot.

 

Broken heart can change a man.

 

Well, that kind of

gloss takes a village.

 

Do you know why I loved

sitting at that table tonight?

Because I was sitting next to you.

That's my favorite place to be.

 

Every garden begins with a single seed,

just like every quilt

begins with a single square.

Every flower has its own occasion.

And each square has

its own story to tell.

At first, you can't see how

one goes with the other.

But when the last flower blooms

and the last square is sewn...

The big picture finally becomes clear.

 

 

EPISODE 12

Every garden needs to be

left fallow for a season.

You let the soil rest

so it can come back

stronger in the spring.

It's the only way for the garden

to transition from death to new life.

 

Yeah, we decide what gets planted.

And how deep.

 

That doesn't mean

there isn't some tiny bit

of room for someone else.

But if you stay in this

game long enough,

then there's bound to be another man

who gets you better than your husband.

 

Well, marriage will

do that to you, Alice.

Look, it's long and

hard and complicated.

But if you're faking

it, you're not in it.

 

Don't waste all that

time if it isn't right.

 

Just because you do a bad thing

doesn't make you a bad person.

 

Let me get this straight.

You rip out my heart,

And now you expect me to help you?

You then spiked it on the ground

while it was still barely beating

and then you stomped

all over it for sport.

 

And the cycle just repeats

itself over and over again,

like a snake eating its tail.

 

When a garden goes fallow,

it may seem like there's nothing to do.

Even though it just looks

like a bunch of empty soil,

it's actually the most crucial time.

The slightest misstep,

like adding too much fertilizer,

can create problems

for generations to come.

That's why you have to be willing

to roll up your sleeves

and get your hands dirty.

Whatever it takes to

protect the garden you love.

 

 

EPISODE 13

Your garden is only as

good as the seeds you plant.

But it's hard to tell

when you get a bad seed.

And you never know how

many there are in a pack.

So in the end, every seed that's planted

is a flip of a coin,

because what looks

perfect on the outside

might be totally rotten on the inside.

 

All right.

But if you poke enough

bears, one's bound to wake up.

 

I'm just saying, sometimes

things that get stolen

aren't always recovered.

 

And, you know, passion,

when you have a passion for something,

you want to learn.

 

Only hurt the ones you love, champ.

You have...

no idea

how different things would be

if you had just come clean.

 

Well, believe me, if I could

go back and just undo it all...

 

Hiding something that

awful, it just rots a person.

It just eats at you

from inside, you know?

Changes you forever.

 

And I guess the truth is,

yeah,

when we're together,

sometimes it does feel

like there could be something more.

 

I've just been getting a

lot of stuff wrong lately.

And I wanted to get

something right for a change.

 

Here's the thing about bad seeds.

They don't all start out that way.

Mother Nature loves to throw curveballs.

Sometimes there are

factors in the garden

beyond our control.

A surprisingly warm spring

can dry your seeds out.

And even the best seeds

can't grow in shoddy soil.

So it doesn't always matter

where your seeds come from

or how much you spend on them

or how perfect they appear.

In the wrong environment,

all seeds can go bad.

 

 

 

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